This is an archive of 115th Congressional Dumpster Fire Fark threads for the month of March, 2017
Click this link for the current month, or here for the rest of the archive.
Background[]
This section will provide background information about the members of the 115th U.S. Congress, or their party affiliation, etc. any information to give a basic overview of the 115th U.S. Congress that does not necessarily need a Fark-related thread.
- date first called into session: January 3, 2017
- date Americans can first expect relief: January 3, 2019
- elections November 6, 2018
- to read about all the legislative crap they're up to click here, for outstanding individual achievements in assholery, click here, for "investigations" click here and for confirmation hearings click here
Congresscritters and how to contact them[]
Current Pending Bills[]
Fark Threads on the President's Address to Congress[]
- Colbert completed Trump's 'say it to my face' challenge
- Here is the real democratic response to Trump's speech
- With a coherent speech for once, Donald Trump may have just had his Bar Mitzvah moment
- Apparently not having learned their lesson from the past election, Democrats pick the most underwhelming candidate they could find to deliver the Democratic response to Trump. How underwhelming? Even Rachel Maddow panned him as small and stunty
- President ME has left the building: Trump references self 60 percent less than Obama in first SOTU address. And remember, this is Donald Trump we are talking about
- Factchecking of Trump's speech exceeds expectations by 17%
- Of the three bills and two executive orders President Trumpler signed yesterday, guess which one wasn't given a signing ceremony or photoshoot
- Trump's first address to congress was watched by three billion people, more than any other American President before him
- We now know Trump is no ballerina, he didn't have a one-night "pivot" concerning his State of the Union speech, so just stop picturing him in a tutu
- Fox News was the most-watched cable network for Trump's State of The Confederacy speech
- "The media's reaction to his speech to Congress was shameful"
Fark Threads on Legislation[]
To stare into the abyss that is the previous months of this circus, please click here (Don't say you weren't warned)
General[]
Repeal of Medicare[]
- Poor people don't want health care and Jesus was against helping the sick for free. Apparently we've been doing it wrong all this time
- Trumpcare raids Medicare to enrich the wealthy and plant a bomb meant to destroy it forever. America First, indeed
Repeal of ACA[]
- Background
- Backlash
- Repeal
- (3/23/2017) Reporter: Sen Roberts are you worried that cuts to the "essential health benefits" regs will cause people to lose access to vital healthcare? Roberts: "Well I sure wouldn't want to lose my mammograms"..hyuk hyuk hy..let me begin my three part apology by...
- Replacement
- A healthcare plan only republicans can see? We are really taxing that "Emperor has no clothes" parable to the limit
- "We won't know what's in the healthcare bill until after it's been voted on." Of course. Typical libe-what? Rand Paul? RAND PAUL
- Another day / another leak / another way / to take a peek / at RyanCare version 10.5
- Finally, House Republicans have released their plan that will replace Obamacare. No, you don't need to know its cost yet, just enjoy the plan. What's that? Who's covered? I SAID JUST ENJOY THE PLAN
- GOP diligently works to reform healthcare by repealing the extremely problematic 10% sales tax on indoor tanning. Maybe if the Great Cheeto doesn't have to pay such high taxes on tanning beds he will layoff the spray
- This timeline of how Trumpcare went from fresh-baked chocolate chip cookies to putrid shiatbiscuits in just 24 hours is a perfect example of how the Trump administration is running like a well-oiled Charlie Sheen
- "You can't wait one week to see what it would cost?" an exasperated Shepard Smith lambastes Republican Congressman Buddy Carter for trying to push through an ill-informed ACA repeal
- Columnist Charles "C-Unit" Krauthammer says the GOP healthcare bill is Obamacare Lite. Bonus: Says the GOP should pass it anyway. Double Bonus: Because this is all FDR, Eisenhower, and Obama's fault
- It looks like the most effective way to save Obamacare is simply to label whatever awful "replacement" the GOP comes up with as "Trumpcare" and sit back and let the Narcissist-in Chief do all the heavy lifting to kill it
- Rand Paul introduces simple bill to full repeal Obamacare titled "Popcorn Dot Gif Act of 2017"
- Much like the average Farker trying to give up drinking, Republicans are finding it hard to give up obstructionism after their 8 year long addiction
- Congressman Burgess (Я-TX) is willing to lose job by causing Americans to lose health insurance
- Could Republican bumbling have resulted in a single-payer health care system? Wait, would that mean Bernie Sanders won after all?
- WTF in Chief Donald Trump warns republicans that by repealing Obamacare they are "putting themselves in a very bad position"
- Shepard Smith says it's "stunning" that after years of Republicans being united on fighting Obamacare, they can't agree on a replacement
- "Repair"
- Rescinding coal miners health benefits
TrumpCare[]
World's Greatest Healthcare Plan of 2017
- World's Greatest Healthcare Plan of 2017. No, really, that`s what it's actually called
- President Trump: Our wonderful new Healthcare Bill is now out for review and negotiation. Kellyanne Conway: TrumpCare? Oh, hell to the no
- The big Trumpcare question: "Can I keep my doctor?" HA HA HA HA HA. NO
- The Uber-conservative National Review "If you want to see political malpractice in action, you don't have to read Donald Trump's latest tweet - just look at the mess Republicans have made of replacing Obamacare"
- Trump tries, fails to be Presidential. This is not a repeat from every hour of every day for the past 47 days
- President Trump (R) in January:"There will be health insurance for everybody. Much less expensive than Obamacare and much better." White House Budget Director Mulvaney (R) in March:"Insurance for ordinary people is not really the end goal"
- Breitbart, Steve Bannon's own personal public relations arm, thinks the GOP's ACA replacement is terrible
- Everyone can relax now, the GOP is not replacing Obamacare completely, just the parts that actually work
- GOP ObamaCare replacement at least has a critical tax break for corporate executives struggling to pay their bribes to lobbyists
- Fox News slams GOP health care reform plan. Yes, THAT Fox News
- For some reason Paul Ryan is acting like your boring poli sci teacher explaining obamacare repeal
- The first House panel advances the ACA repeal
- Hey, wait a second. Why AREN'T the insurance companies screaming bloody murder about the potential destruction of the individual insurance market?
- Brookings Institute:"At least 15 million will lose their coverage under the American Health Care Act." Congressional Republicans:"We don't like your negative analysis so we'll make our own. With some spreadsheets or whatever"
- Paul Ryan; "Trump will never win a beauty contest." Wait, what? Oh, Trumpcare will never win a beauty contest. Coulda went either way
- Sarah Palin (yeah, her) actually manages to veer close to a couple of salient points before the wheels inevitably fly off
- Trump voters to be hardest hit by Trump's health care plan. Clinton voters still set to suffer debilitating cases of schadenfreude
- Even Breitbart thinks that Tom Price's comments that "everyone will be covered" under Trumpscare was the lie of the year
- CBO will release their score for Trumpcare at 4 PM, to be followed by Presidential toilet rant on twitter at 5 AM
- CBO estimates 14 million people losing health insurance if American Health Act is passed
- CBO projects iPhone sales to drop by 14M in 2018, accelerate to over 24 million by 2026
- NBC Reporter: "Can we trust that what the President says is real?" Bullshiat Spice: "If he's not joking, of course"
- Sean Spicer seemed shocked to hear Jim Acosta say poor people existed; he just thought it was a myth like Star Wars or Hillary Clinton having people murdered
- Newt licks himself some Trump butt. Mmm, that's good Trump butt
- Trump White House on CBO report on Trumpcare: unbelievable, fake news. Our own analysis shows that by 2026 twice as many Americans will lose health insurance as the CBO report. So there
- CBO report suggests TrumpCare may be responsible for thousands of unplanned births. Man, I keep hearing he's screwing us, but I didn't take it literally
- (3/23/2017) CBO just released scoring for amended Trumpcare bill. HOLY FARK: 52 million uninsured, and premiums would skyrocket. LGT PDF
- As their Obamacare replacement cuts off funds for Planned Parenthood, Republicans want to reassure women that other clinics will step up to provide their low-cost breast exams, contraception and cancer screenings. Let's see how that worked in TX
- Paul Ryan would like to remind all Americans that Trump had his tiny hands all over the crafting of the GOP's healthcare legislation
- Trump's agenda hinges on the fate of Trumpscare
- GOP is scrambling to re-write their healthcare bill after the CBO estimates show just how much it will piss off their voting base of old white people
- Trumpcare raids Medicare to enrich the wealthy and plant a bomb meant to destroy it forever. America First, indeed
- A bunch of GOP senators are rooting for Republican healthcare efforts to fail because they don't want to get blamed for killing millions of people
- 1) Don't get sick. 2) If you do get sick, die quickly
- With his so-called healthcare bill imploding, Paul Ryan does the only thing he can do - schedule a final vote on it for next week
- HHS Sec. Tom Price says that benchmark for healthcare should be care, not insurance coverage. Aight we can all agree on that? Now let's hear how Trump/GOP plans to provide said care... oh laissez-faire mmmkay that worked magnificently the last time
- Ryan goes all in on Don'tCare
- Rand Paul predicts that Trumpcare will pass, fail completely, and only then after the complete collapse of the healthcare system will any real negotiations towards healthcare reform begin
- Trump threatens Republicans to support TrumpCare or lose their seats. Or possibly grab them by it, one of the two
- Bullshiat Spice: Come on guys, obviously the President was having some fun with recalcitrant GOP members who refuse to back Health Care bill, he wasn't actually threatening them...no, really. Trust him
- What's it like to have Trump grab you by the pussy?
- "If they vote against [Trumpcare] they could face the wrath of a vengeful and combative president. If they vote for it, they risk retribution from the Koch [bros.] and other powerful right-wing players whose money can be pivotal in re-election races"
- Republican Senator thinks that maybe, possibly, Republican voters might get mad at them for passing a bill that doesn't do anything remotely close to what they've been promising for 7 years
- President Trump's stellar negotiation tactics have caused three wavering Republican lawmakers to firm up their stance on the ACA repeal-and-replace bill: they came out against it
- 2009 GOP: Democrats adding incentives to the ACA bill in exchange for votes is pure evil. 2017 GOP: Hey NY delegation, what'll it take to buy your votes for our bill?
- Let's check in with some actual healthcare providers and see what they think about Paul Ryan's Trumpcare powerpoint.... oh. Oh my
- GOP: We can't vote for Trumpcare. It's terrible. Trump: What if we fix it so states can require Medicaid recipients to work to get Medicaid? GOP: ...Go on
- (3/23/2017) TrumpCare is so full of win, only 17% of voters approve of it -- including a paltry 41% of Republicans
- (3/23/2017) We're going to vote today to throw 24 million Americans off healthcare. Why don't we just go ahead and arrest 54 disabled people in wheelchairs protesting while we're at it? That ought to generate some favorable press
- (3/24/2017) Old and busted: "We have to pass the bill so that you can find out what is in it." New hotness: "Once we get it done, we can have the chance to really explain it"
- (3/24/2017) Trump comes out with withdrawal method for GOP package
- (3/24/2017) Congressman: You know, it might be a good idea to pause the President's legislative agenda until the investigation into his possible collusion with the Russian government is complete
- (3/24/2017) Sometimes you drain the swamp, sometimes the swamp drains you
GOP Vote on TrumpCare Leaning ...[]
- General
- (3/23/2017) Will the Affordable Care Act be repealed, paving the way for Trumpscare? Will enough GOP votes flip to the other side and keep the ACA intact? Trump forced a vote without having support. It's your Official ACA Repeal Discussion Thread Live thread
- (3/23/2017) Trump and pals just rewrote the Trumpcare bill to appease the right-wingers and you'll never guess what happened to the support from the moderates
- (3/23/2017) Despite overnight scrambling, as of this morning, Republican House "no" vote counts on Obamacare repeal sit at 36, well above the 22 vote threshold needed to kill the bill
- (3/23/2017) Republicans delay Trumpcare vote after failing to garner enough votes for passage
- (3/23/2017) Russian backed despot issues terroristic demand to U.S. government
- (3/24/2017) Donald Trump is taking on The Freedom Caucus. Whoever wins, we lose 👑
- (3/24/2017) The healthcare vote hasn't even happened yet and already Republicans are accusing each other of epic blunders, drinking fetus smoothies, and loving communism
- (3/24/2017) They don't have the votes
- (3/24/2017) Yesterday's ACA vote was delayed after threats. Will Trump's cunning stunt pay off, or will he be handed a bipartisan defeat? It's do-or-die for American Health Care as the House votes on Trumpscare. Vote Cancelled Live thread
- (3/24/2017) Trumpcare debate and vote at 3:30 EST. Watch it become Failcare Live thread
- (3/24/2017) Will he announce his resignation on the heels of a crushing defeat? Will he blame the Democrats? Will he blame Trump and Pence? THIS is your Paul Ryan "seppuku" press conference (4pm start) Live thread
- (3/24/2017) Sometimes you drain the swamp, sometimes the swamp drains you
- Still On the Fence
- No
- Rep. Rod Blum (R IA 1st)
(President Trump's stellar negotiation tactics have caused three wavering Republican lawmakers to firm up their stance on the ACA repeal-and-replace bill: they came out against it) - Rep. Ted Budd (R NC 13th)
President Trump's stellar negotiation tactics have caused three wavering Republican lawmakers to firm up their stance on the ACA repeal-and-replace bill: they came out against it) - Rep. Leonard Lance (R NJ 7th)
President Trump's stellar negotiation tactics have caused three wavering Republican lawmakers to firm up their stance on the ACA repeal-and-replace bill: they came out against it)
- Rep. Rod Blum (R IA 1st)
TrumpCare Failure[]
- (3/25/2017) "The businessman president, who sold himself to tens of millions of disillusioned voters last year as the outsider who could tame a broken capital, ended his first confrontation with lawmakers overmatched, outmaneuvered and ultimately empty-handed"
- (3/25/2017) Derpbert says that by suffering a crushing, embarrassing defeat on health care, Trump actually won and is actually stronger than ever. He would explain how, but it would require charts, graphs, and an abacus. And really, who has time?
- (3/26/2017) Pence says, don't worry people of West Virginia, the scourge of public insurance will be gone with nothing good to replace it because I'm a Republican. Oops, did I say that out loud?
- (3/26/2017) Trump voters, angered and outraged that the Affordable Care Act was not repealed [which is good for them], blame everyone but the actual source of the failure
- (3/26/2017) Conservative media agrees: Trump is not to blame for the Trumpscare failure
- (3/25/2017) "The GOP was counting on wiping out nearly $1 trillion in Obamacare taxes to help finance the sweeping tax cuts they've got planned for their next legislative act. And now it's unclear where all that money will come from." Fark needs a "ha-ha" tag ✂
- (3/25/2017) Paul Ryan: We've spent so much time being the party of "no" that we've forgotten how to govern
- (3/26/2017) Steve Bannon has lost control of the classroom
- (3/26/2017) Earlier today, Trump went on Twitter to tell his cultish followers to tune in to Fox News and watch Judge Jeanine. Those who did saw her channel her inner Trump and demand Paul Ryan step down as Speaker of the House
- (3/26/2017) Priebus: Trump had no idea whatsoever that Judge Pirro was going to say all of those nasty things about Paul Ryan when he urged everyone to watch her show on Saturday
- (3/25/2017) Who run Congresstown? Who... run... Congresstown? Freedom Caucus runs Congresstown. FREEDOM CAUCUS RUNS CONGRESSTOWN
- (3/26/2017) "Mr. President, we need to figure out how to win back the Freedom Caucus." "I know, I'll link them to the evil Dumbocrats, so my followers will all turn on them." "Umm...brilliant idea, Mr. President"
- (3/26/2017) Trump is 'red hot' with rage over healthcare debacle and determined to make disloyal Republicans pay
- (3/27/2017) Trump's repeal Obamacare is re-imagined as a D&D game gone awry. Check out next week when Prince Trump (R-avnos) blows all his illusions covering a secret Tzimisce connection in a Vampire: The Masquerade LARP session
- (3/27/2017) Every tough vote is going to suffer the same fate as Trumpcare, because even in a sleazy town like DC, the only currency in a tough vote is trust. And literally nobody trusts Trump
- (3/28/2017) Turns out Paul Ryan's reputation as a wonky genius was a bit oversold; Republicans are bedazzled when you bother to use numbers at all, but his tax plan is "a modest proposal"-level garbage
- (3/28/2017) Trumpscare did not have the support of the majority of Trump voters
- (3/29/2017) New poll shows deluded Republicans blame the "bad bill" for Trumpscare failure and not Trump
- (3/31/2017) Asshole sides with taint against dick
Zombie TrumpCare[]
- (3/28/2017) 'She'll be back. I barely touched her. And it was just the one time with her sister.'
- (3/28/2017) Obamacare repeal is not dead, is getting better, thinks it'll go for a walk
- (3/29/2017) Trump and GOP last week: "We have no healthcare Plan B, if this fails, that's it." This week: "We totally have like 50 Plan Bs and we're very determined to kill as many of you people as possible"
- (3/30/2017) Paul Ryan refuses to work with Democrats on health-care legislation, a fact that will not in any way prevent him from blaming them when it doesn't pass
Monitor Russian Sanctions[]
H.R. 1313[]
bypass GINA (Genetic Information Nondiscrimination Act of 2008)
Convert Abandoned Mine Lands reserve[]
make $1 billion available to help coal workers
H.R. 985[]
"Fairness" in Class Action Litigation Act
H.R. 720[]
Lawsuit Abuse "Reduction" Act
RANDPAUL ObamaCare Repeal bill[]
Active Cyber Defense Certainty (ACDC) Act[]
"Get Hacked, Hack Back" would amend the Computer Fraud and Abuse Act of xxxx
SOAR[]
Scholarships for Opportunity and Results Reauthorization Act
funding religious schools in D.C.
GOP Infrastructure Plan[]
Hearing Protection Act[]
misnamed bill regarding gun silencers
Overturning Obama-era Regulations[]
FCC privacy regulations[]
Repeal ESSA[]
Every Student Succeeds Act
Ratify NATO confirmation for Montenegro[]
Sell ISP information to advertisers[]
Senate Joint Resolution 34
- (3/23/2017) By 50-48 vote, the Senate passes Flake's bill to allow your ISP to sell your browsing history to anyone willing to pay for it. Evil corporations are getting tired of winning and having you for lunch
- (3/29/2017) Yesterday, Congress killed internet privacy, so let's support a crowdfunding campaign that seeks to purchase and publish the search histories of all U.S. lawmakers responsible for this
- (3/29/2017) Even the clowns from the Breitbart comments cesspool think the GOP are a bunch of dickbags for overturning Obama's online privacy regulations
Competitive Health Insurance Reform Act of 2017 (H.R. 372)[]
repeal McCarran-Ferguson special exemption from federal antitrust laws
Drug-testing unemployment applicants[]
- (3/28/2017) While we were distracted by Russia and healthcare, Congress voted to drug test the unemployed
MAR-A-LAGO Act[]
Make Access Records Available to Lead American Government Openness Act
- (3/24/2017) Democratic Congressman: Since the President claims he works while golfing at Mar-a-lago, shouldn't he be publishing the visitor's log so that we know who is influencing him? Oh yeah, while we're at it, let's demand the White House log as well
- (3/28/2017) Good thing people like Russian oligarchs don't visit Trump and associates at Mar-a-Lago. I mean, imagine if there were visitor logs and records of those visits? Boy, would it look bad if they were on there, ya know?
- (3/29/2017) Government Accountability Office decides that maybe it should look into this whole "Mar A Lago" thing. At least until Trump declares them enemy combatants
Compel President to release his taxes[]
- (3/29/2017) House Republicans block effort by Democrats to obtain President Trump's taxes because of course they did
Budget[]
- (3/25/2017) "The GOP was counting on wiping out nearly $1 trillion in Obamacare taxes to help finance the sweeping tax cuts they've got planned for their next legislative act. And now it's unclear where all that money will come from." Fark needs a "ha-ha" tag ✂
- (3/27/2017) "He is fine taking eyeglasses from children so he can pass a bill," an angry Joy Reid says of Paul Ryan and his ironic Ayn Rand philosophy. When will Republicans learn Rand was a welfare queen with terrible ideologies that would destroy America?
Deficit[]
- (3/27/2017) Now that they control government again, Republicans are back to saying that "deficits don't matter"
Tax Cuts[]
The HONEST Act[]
Honest and Open New EPA Science Treatment Act
- would prohibit the EPA from writing any regulation that uses science that is not publicly available
Net Neutrality[]
Tax "Reform"[]
- (3/30/2017) History proves the White House will not be able to drive the tax reform train; they will, in fact, derail it
- (3/31/2017) Paul Ryan's tax plan could finally achieve equality in the US ... by shifting 99.6 percent of the tax relief to the wealthiest 1 percent of the country so that everybody else can be equally poor
Fark Threads on Congressional Investigations[]
To view the full mess starting from January, 2017, please click here (Don't say you weren't warned)
Trump Campaign contacts with Russia[]
- Democrats are finally realizing that Comey knows quite a bit more about Russia and Trump than he's letting on
- Is Trey Ghowzi a scandal yet?
- Realizing that their base will still vote for them regardless of what he does, the GOP stays on the SS Trump
- The Trump-Beltway wars have only just begun
- Sorry Dems, the whole Jeff Sessions gig you've got going is nothing but fake news
- And here it is. The stupidest thing you will read all day
- FBI and NSA called to testify on Trump-Russia investigation. CIA was going to be called, but thanks to Wikileaks, Congress already knows what CIA was going to say anyway
- Nothing to see here -- just Trump associates directly communicating with Russian hackers mere weeks before the DNC was hacked
- AG Sessions: "Khorosho, ya sdelayu vse, chto vozmozhno, chtoby vosstanovit' nezavisimost' i professionalizm Ministerstva yustitsii"
- Trump Campaign Knew
- Russian spies offer to help tech companies overcome American spies
- White House finally responds to growing questions about Wikileaks CIA dump, Trump's wiretap accusation and connections to Russia...by canceling all press events
- White House spokesperson: Trump doesn't know a damn thing
- FBI continues investigating the "odd" cyber link between a Russian bank and Trump's corporate holdings
- All of Trump's ties to Russia laid out in one easy char- Really? Seven? We need THAT Many? OK, fine: All of Trump's ties to Russia laid out in SEVEN, actually fairly complicated charts
- Sen. Murphy says what many of us are thinking, Wikileaks timing for releasing this info on the CIA is suspiciously timed, almost as if they were trying to deflect attention from something else, but what could that be?
- Lindsey Graham vows to "find out all things Russian" and has put Trump right in his crosshairs
- James Comey to officially reveal if FBI is investigating Trump's ties to Russia during presidential election
- Russian oligarch who purchased Trump's Palm Beach mansion for way above market price, admits his plane and Trump's shared a tarmac in North Carolina days before the election, but totally did not meet or anything, trust him
- Senate Intelligence Committee
- Trump allies Roger Stone and Paul Manafort both wanted for questioning in Russia investigations
- (3/24/2017) After CNN reports that Trump aides are being investigated by the FBI for collusion with Russia, Roger Stone sends a ranting letter saying he was defamed and will "spank" his accusers "like little children". Difficulty: he wasn't named in the report
- And today Comey throws Trump under the bus
- House Intelligence Committee
- Will Comey reveal that Trump is a puppet? Will the pee tape come to light? Will Trump demand Comey's head after the hearing? THIS is your House Intelligence Committee Hearing on Russia-gate thread (hearing starts at 10 AM EDT on C-SPAN)
- Comey confirms the FBI is investigating Trump team for Russia connections they can sweep under the rug
- James Comey answers the least suspenseful question in recorded history
- Rep Trey Gowdy attempts a high profile "But what about..." during the Comey hearing, but doesn't quite stick the landing
- Pretty much, the only way today could have gone worse for Trump is if PornHub added a "presidential watersports" category to their search engine or Melania was revealed as a victim of "the Fappening 2.0"
- White House continues to defend wiretapping claim despite today's contrary statements from "so-called FBI Director" Comey
- (3/29/2017) You have to hand it to House Republicans, they are steadfastly refusing to throw Devin Nunes under the bus, instead they've decided they will ALL climb under the bus together and show those wheels who's boss
- (3/29/2017) The evidence is now clear that the White House and Devin Nunes, the chairman of the House Intelligence Committee, have worked together to halt the Russia Investigation
- (3/29/2017) Devin Nunes explains that he wouldn't be totally cocking up this whole Russian investigation if the Democrats weren't forcing him to do a really bad job and also to betray his responsibility by being Trump's bootlicking toadie. See? The Dems did it
- Will Comey reveal that Trump is a puppet? Will the pee tape come to light? Will Trump demand Comey's head after the hearing? THIS is your House Intelligence Committee Hearing on Russia-gate thread (hearing starts at 10 AM EDT on C-SPAN)
- (3/30/2017) Paul Ryan: "I've seen the documents that Freaked Devin Nunes out. But I don't think he has"
- (3/30/2017) Two aides have hit the Nunes Tower. Oh the hilarity
- Minor unpaid Trump volunteer Paul Manafort was paid millions to push pro-Putin policy in US and Europe for the last decade
- A lot of smoke so far, here's some actual fire: US officials say Trump campaign coordinated with the Russians
- (3/25/2017) NBC's Andrea Mitchell: White House officials are "purging their cell phones" in expectation of getting subpoenaed
- (3/25/2017) CNN analyst says the FBI has flipped Michael Flynn in a deal to implicate others in the Trump administration for colluding with Russia
- (3/28/2017) What's this? Oh nothing, just a letter from the Justice Department trying to use the presidential communication privilege to block former Attorney General Sally Yates from testifying before the House Intelligence Committee about Trump-Russia ties
- (3/28/2017) Nunes: How can a blind man be a lookout? Graham: How can an idiot be the House Intelligence Committee Chairman? Nunes: ___
- (3/28/2017) Russian bank: Oh f*ck yes, we met with Jared. It was glorious
- (3/29/2017) Why the FBI cannot expose the Trump/Russian collusion
- (3/29/2017) Comey tried to warn us
- (3/30/2017) The Senate Intelligence Committee holds open hearings on the Russian involvement in the 2016 US Presidential elections and other elections across Europe. Get your popcorn ready, folks. 10:00 AM EDT on C-SPAN 3 Live thread
- (3/30/2017) So, what did Kushner discuss with the Russians?
- (3/30/2017) Flynn offers to testify in exchange for Immunity, Jeff Bridges giving him back that arcade
- (3/31/2017) Trump praises Mike Flynn for seeking immunity after watching Fox & Friends. I guess the segment didn't tell Trump who Flynn will be testifying against
- (3/31/2017) Jayson Chaffetz has rare moment of clarity, points out that Donnie needs to STFU about Flynn's request for immunity. Things to return to normal in Jason's head in 3, 2, 1
- (3/31/2017) How to make Trump rage-quit an exec order signing ceremony. Step 1: have CBS' Major Garrett ask a question about Michael Flynn (skip video to 42:30)
- (3/31/2017) Senate Intelligence Committee to Mike Flynn: NO IMMUNITY FOR YOU
- (3/31/2017) The five biggest moments in the downfall of Michael Flynn, who proved Sally Yates correct
- (3/31/2017) Trump praises Mike Flynn for seeking immunity after watching Fox & Friends. I guess the segment didn't tell Trump who Flynn will be testifying against
Possible Russian Interference Of 2016 POTUS Election[]
- And Jeff recuses
- The fact that the Top Republican on the House Intelligence Committee which has been charged with looking into Russia's interference in the election was also a member of Trump's transition team should in no way cast doubt on the panel's work
- You know all those "BernieBros"? Turns out some were probably paid Russian agents, not that there are any here on Fark, of course
Possible Interference with Economic Sanctions against Russia[]
- Senate Judiciary Committee
"asked the White House and law enforcement agencies to keep materials related to Trump associates’ alleged ties to Russia" - Senate Intelligence Committee
"asked federal agencies to keep materials that tie into its investigation into Russian cyber hacking and other efforts to disrupt the election"
- And.... Here.... We... Go
- AG Sessions to hold press conference at 4pm Eastern, presumably to tell us that he did not have relations with that country. Or that he did. Either way, grab the popcorn, and here we go, again
Release of President's Tax Returns[]
- White House releases tax info before Maddow's show, then Trump gets on the Twitter and calls it fake. WTF is this guy's problem?
- Donald Trump Jr. goes on Twitter rant about fake news after Rachel Maddow unveiled his father's very real tax returns
- Trump attorney challenges Scarborough to prove Trump team is behind tax leak, because proof is something everyone else has to provide
- And the biggest revelation from President Trump's leaked tax return? He will benefit more than anyone else with his proposed tax plan
- Maddow: Guys, there's a reason his campaign theme was "You can't always get what you want"
- Rachel Maddow rickrolled her liberal flock, and they love her for it and can't wait for the next benevolent serving of anti-Trump scraps
- Is MSNBC lackey Rachel Maddow in legal trouble for publishing Trump's tax return? Probably not but she should be
- "I know we at MSNBC done goofed. But hey, its real, so at least we got that going for us"
Possible Violation(s) of Emoluments Clause by POTUS or POTUS Staff[]
Obama's Last-minute Weapons Shipment to Kenya[]
Rep. Nadler's "Resolution of Inquiry"[]
demanding Attorney General hand over “any document, record, memo, correspondence or other communication” pertaining to “criminal or counterintelligence investigations” related to Trump, White House staff or his business"
Obama Alleged Phone Tapping[]
- House Intelligence Committee requests that Trump FW:FW:FW:FW:FW: over his evidence of wiretapping by Monday
- House Intelligence Committee set today as the deadline for Trump to provide evidence he was the victim of an Obama "wiretapp." Will Trump follow through? What will happen if he fails to provide the evidence? Either way, things will get crazy today
- Spicer will finally reveal the wiretapping evidence against Obama- or implode. (Live at 1ish EST)
- Obviously, the reason no one can find any evidence that Obama ordered Trump wiretapped is because he asked James Bond to do it
- House judiciary Republicans ask for FBI briefing on Trump's wiretapping claims, moon landing from 1969, and whereabouts of the Tooth Fairy
- Trump defenders are starting to sound like English Lit professors at a Joyce seminar: "So now you have to decide, are you going to take the tweets literally? And if you are then clearly the president was wrong. But if you're not"
- Obviously, the reason no one can find any evidence that Obama ordered Trump wiretapped is because he asked James Bond to do it
- Secret Service laptop containing the floor plans to Trump Tower and info about the Clinton email investigation stolen
- "Circumstantial evidence" regarding collusion between Russia and Trump campaign. The seven or so Trump surrogates who had many meetings with Russians not withstanding
- And today Comey throws Trump under the bus
- UK Intelligence Chief warns that Russia may have been behind Donald Trump's claim that British intelligence had wiretapped Trump Tower
- White House continues to defend wiretapping claim despite today's contrary statements from "so-called FBI Director" Comey
- David Cameron jokes that a main perk of no longer being British Prime Minister is that he doesn't have to listen to Donald Trump's wiretapped conversations any more, proving British brand of Conservative Humour is as weak as its American cousin
- Former Nixon White House Counsel John Dean: The actions of the Trump White House in response to the Russia story seem AWFULLY familiar to me...wait, don't tell me, it'll come to me any second
- People close to the president say Mr. Trump's Twitter torrent had less to do with fact, strategy or tactic than a sense of persecution bordering on faith: He simply believes that he was bugged in some way, by someone
- Rep. Nunes claims that Trump people were picked up on FBI wiretaps of Russians, which means, technically, Obama wiretapped the Trump campaign, which is the best kind of wiretapping
House Intelligence Committee[]
- 20 March 2017
- FBI director James Comey
- NSA director Admiral Mike Rogers, US Navy
- "FBI investigation...could hamper [Trump's political agenda for months, if not years, to come." HA. Years?]
- The FBI Russia probe will also investigate the Western wing of Russia's propaganda machine, Breitbart and Infowars
- The internet is forever, and things you post can come back to haunt you later. Isn't that right, Mrs. Kellyanne "Ha, ha, you're being investigated by the FBI" Conway?
- "The FBI probe into Trump and Russia is huge news. Our political system isn't ready for it"
- (3/23/2017) Devin Nunes may be trying to save his own ass
- (3/23/2017) House intel committee head apologizes for his actions yesterday, saying, "Was that wrong? Should I have not done that?"
- (3/23/2017) Kayleigh McEnany tried to say her fellow CNN panelists didn't support the Fourth Amendment. She was quickly humiliated, as is tradition
- (3/23/2017) George W. Bush's ethics lawyer says FBI is "uncovering evidence of treason" by far right US news websites over their links with Russia. In other news, Bush had an ethics lawyer. Who knew?
- (3/23/2017) Rep. Quigley (D-Down Under) becomes second intel committee member to confirm more-than-circumstantial evidence of Trump-Russia collusion during the '16 campaign
- (3/24/2017) Former Trump campaign hanger-on Paul Manafort offers to perjure himself in front of the House Intelligence Committee
- (3/24/2017) Former Trump campaign hanger-on Paul Manafort offers to perjure himself in front of the House Intelligence Committee
- (3/24/2017) For no apparent reason, the Republican Intelligence Committee Chair decided to cancel the public hearing on the panels investigation of Trump and possible collusion with Russia
- (3/25/2017) The conspiracy thickens as it's revealed House Intelligence Chair Devin Nunes went on a dead of night excursion and vanished from view the night prior to revealing the full details of the Intel revelations on Trump
- (3/26/2017) Suitcases full of unmarked bills are out. These days you just have dirty politicians invest in a bit of real property or a brand and then flip that brand for a thousand times its worth while forcing distribution through an oligarch-controlled market Nunes’ heavily invested in company with ties to Russia
Independent Commission[]
to investigate allegations of potential coordination between the Trump campaign and the Russians
- House Intelligence Committee Democrat Adam Schiff calls for independent investigation after Chairperson Devin Nunes decides to throw protocol out the window and brief the President that shiat is hitting the fan faster than anyone expected *DUN DUN*
- (3/29/2017) Apparently Carly is more than just a wee bit miffed that nobody on the Trump transition team would return her calls
Senate Intelligence Committee[]
Fark Threads on Trump cabinet confirmation hearings[]
There was a whole lot more than appears here, please check the archive for the full horror show
General[]
Senate Rule 19[]
Carson for Secretary of Housing and Urban Development[]
Perry for Secretary of Energy[]
Bannon for Führer of National Security Council[]
Acosta for Labor[]
Wilson for Secretary of the Air Force[]
Fark Threads on Federal Judiciary Confirmation Hearings[]
General[]
Gorsuch for Supreme Court Justice[]
- Democrats paralyzed as Gorsuch skates. To be fair, his Biellmann spin and stag jump combo earned him a 10.0 from the Ecuadorian judges
- If Neil Gorsuch isn't a legitimate SCOTUS judge, then I understand the Senate has ways of shutting that down
- Will Democrats find their collective spines and be able to repel the nightmare of Conservative extremism that is Neil Gorsuch? Will we be reminded of the GOP's obstruction? It's your Official Supreme Court Confirmation Hearing Discussion Thread
- GOP Senators ask Judge Gorsuch the probing questions: "What's the answer to life, the universe, and everything?" and "Would you rather fight 1 horse-sized duck or 100 duck-sized horses?" Hey, I thought there wasn't going to be a litmus test
- Gorsuch believes it is improper to state opinions about historic cases. A SCOTUS appointee with no opinion or regard for precedent? The perfect candidate
- Unanimous Supreme Court overturns a Gorsuch decision ... in the middle of his confirmation hearing
- Supreme Court Nominee thinks you should die to protect your company's property, no word on if he thinks the company owes you a funeral or if they can sue your spouse for cleaning up after your corpse
- (3/23/2017) Arizona Senator Jeff Flake asks Neil Gorsuch if he would rather fight "one horse- sized duck or 100 duck-sized horses." At least that explains how the Senator ended up with his last name
- (3/23/2017) Sen. Chuck Schumer: "Eight is enough"
- (3/24/2017) Could be when conservatives finally wake up about their Supreme Court pick Justice Neil Gorsuch, he might just become their worst nightmare
- (3/25/2017) Lindsey Graham holds a town hall in deep red South Carolina to say he supports Judge Gorsuch's nomination to the Supreme Court. Let's check in to see how it goes. Ohlawdy.jpg
- (3/29/2017) GOP: Either Gorsuch or Gohome
- (3/29/2017) "No matter who's in power" only applies when Democrats have it
- (3/30/2017) How many days does it take for Democratic Senator spines to crack and disintegrate into dust? Ah-one... ah-ha two.... ahhhh three. Three
- (3/30/2017) Sen. Claire McCaskill (D-MO) can't decide if she'd rather lose her seat in a general election, or a primary
- (3/30/2017) GOP calls potential Gorsuch filibuster by Democrats "unprecedented". Merrick Garland unavailable for comment
- (3/30/2017) First two Democratic Senators choose to be primaried next year, drag the Overton Window further rightward
- (3/31/2017) Senator Richard Blumenthal will cast a no vote in confirming Gorsuch
Fark threads on Trump Ambassadorships[]
Please check the archive for previous threads on Ambassadorships since there probably won't be any more ambassadors in the future
Palin for Ambassador to Canada[]
soorry, eh
Ambassador to Russia[]
UN Ambassador for Food and Agriculture[]
- (March, 2017) Brownback catches last chopper outta Saigon...er....Kansas Kansas governor being considered for UN Ambassador for Food and AgricultureTemplate:Horse
Fark Threads on Oversight[]
No Oversight[]
FCC Oversight Hearing[]
on Net Neutrality
House Committee on Energy and Commerce[]
hearing on TrumpCare
Reports from Congressional Budget Office[]
cost of GOP healthcare misadventures
- GOP wants you to know that Keith Hall is a liberal hack who isn't fit to be CBO director
(the previous link occured prior to the CBO's official announcement) - CBO will release their score for Trumpcare at 4 PM, to be followed by Presidential toilet rant on twitter at 5 AM
- CBO estimates 14 million people losing health insurance if American Health Act is passed
- CBO projects iPhone sales to drop by 14M in 2018, accelerate to over 24 million by 2026
- NBC Reporter: "Can we trust that what the President says is real?" Bullshiat Spice: "If he's not joking, of course"
- Newt licks himself some Trump butt. Mmm, that's good Trump butt
- Trump White House on CBO report on Trumpcare: unbelievable, fake news. Our own analysis shows that by 2026 twice as many Americans will lose health insurance as the CBO report. So there
- If you hated Obamacare because your premiums went up too much, just wait until you try the new and improved 750% hike in Trumpcare
- Brookings Institute:"At least 15 million will lose their coverage under the American Health Care Act." Congressional Republicans:"We don't like your negative analysis so we'll make our own. With some spreadsheets or whatever"
Federal government’s use of facial recognition[]
House Oversight and Government Reform Committee
Federal student loans[]
Subcommittee on Higher Education and Workforce Development
Senate Armed Services Committee[]
- Army Gen. Curtis Scaparrotti
Supreme Allied Commander Europe (SACEUR) of NATO Allied Command Operations, commander of the United States European Command- (3/24/2017) Trump campaign accused of aiding the Taliban
House Oversight Committee[]
Senate Intelligence Committee[]
- (3/27/2017) The Senate Intelligence Committee, the one NOT run by a Trump "stooge," has decided they would like "a word" with Trump son-in-law/beard Jared Kushner about the words he exchanged before the election with a Russian bank chief and the Ambassador
- (3/29/2017) Senate intelligence leaders say starting tomorrow 20 people will be questioned to finally get to the bottom of what influence Russia had over the Clintons during the 2016 election
March 31, 2017 Hearing[]
- Title: "Disinformation: A Primer in Russian Active Measures and Influence Campaigns"
- Testimony
- Clinton Watt
former FBI Special Agent; fellow, Foreign Policy Research Institute
- Clinton Watt
- (3/31/2017) With Nixon, it was 'follow the money'. With Trump is more like "follow the trail of dead Russians.'
- (3/31/2017) "Part of the reason active measures have worked in this U.S. election is because the commander in chief has used Russian active measures, at times, against his opponents"
House Agriculture Committee[]
hearing to discuss considering requiring SNAP beneficiaries to work
Fark Threads on Congresscritters[]
The only reason why there is an archive for these assholes is so people might see examples of what not to do
General[]
- If the Republican party still has a moral center, it needs to find it or face extinction
- Apparently Republicans have become Russia's b*tches
- Right-wing House Republicans not happy with slow progress of Obamacare repeal so they're gonna build their own ACA repeal bills. With blackjack. And hookers
- Much like the average Farker trying to give up drinking, Republicans are finding it hard to give up obstructionism after their 8 year long addiction
- ProPublica fact-checks lawmakers' constituent letters and finds out that both sides really are bad. ChecktetrisBOOMSHAKALAKA, libulardorethuglikans
Caucuses[]
Congressional Black Caucus[]
- (3/23/2017/9525746) Lionel, could you get the waiter for a second, I want to leave him a big tip to show how much I love you people. What? Whaddya mean this isn't a restaurant? Who've I been tipping this whole time? bf{{}}
House Freedom Caucus[]
- (3/24/2017) Donald Trump is taking on The Freedom Caucus. Whoever wins, we lose 👑
- (3/25/2017) Who run Congresstown? Who... run... Congresstown? Freedom Caucus runs Congresstown. FREEDOM CAUCUS RUNS CONGRESSTOWN
- (3/26/2017) RNC PR-BS: White House will court moderate Democrats on the border wall-containing tax plan, possibly bypassing the House Freedom Caucus
- (3/27/2017) The House Freedom Caucus' next trick: demanding that Planned Parenthood be defunded in the spending bill next month, or block it, threatening a shutdown of the Federal Government
- (3/27/2017) Rep Ted Poe (R-TX) resigns from the Freedom Caucus saying "some of its members would vote against the Ten Commandments if it came up for a vote". Hard to tell if he was being serious or just trolling
- Rep. Mark Meadows (R NC 11th)
- (3/30/2017) 193 Democrats, 30 Freedom Caucus members. Enough to start impeachment proceedings. Guess who Trump just called out on Twitter 👑
- (3/31/2017) Asshole sides with taint against dick
Republican Caucus[]
- (3/29/2017) "Party before country" sinks to unprecedented depths as the GOP largely can't stand Trump but remains painfully and shamefully silent in the face of his trainwreck presidency
- (3/29/2017) You have to hand it to House Republicans, they are steadfastly refusing to throw Devin Nunes under the bus, instead they've decided they will ALL climb under the bus together and show those wheels who's boss
Meetings[]
Members informally discuss the President's proposed budget[]
- GOP to Trump: No, you can't shut down Meals on Wheels
- Congressional Republicans rebuke Trump's budget
- The age of open government is ending
- GOP Representatives: Here we'll put $75* billion into the bill. Don't ask what it does. We won't know until the Senate passes it
Special Election[]
Montana[]
- At-large Congressional District
to fill seat of Ryan Zinke, who is now Secretary of the Interior
- Greg Gianforte (R)
- Rob Quist (D)
Montana's holding a runoff for its lone seat in the House between a Republican who funded a Creationist museum and tried to kill public fishing access near his house, and a Democrat who once put on the world's largest charity kegger. Why even vote?
Obedient GOP[]
Senator Marco Rubio (R FL)[]
- Senators who have an office in your home states, please raise your hands. Not so fast, Senator Rubio
- Marco Rubio says Snoop Dogg shouldn't have shot a toy gun at a clown dressed as President Trump, possibly since second amendment solutions for problems should only be proposed by clowns
- Marco Rubio says Snoop Dogg should have been more careful about pretending to shoot a Trump clown in a video because "presidents have been assassinated before"
- (3/30/2017) GOP calls potential Gorsuch filibuster by Democrats "unprecedented". Merrick Garland unavailable for comment
- (3/31/2017) Little Marco says Russia targeted him too
Rep. Darrell Issa (R CA 49th)[]
- To no one's surprise, Darrell Issa wasn't actually serious about calling for investigations into the Trump administration
- Judge tosses out defamation lawsuit because Darrell Issa (R-dishonest and CAllous) failed to show that he wasn't dishonest and callous
Senator RANDPAUL (R KY)[]
- Rand Paul introduces simple bill to full repeal Obamacare titled "Popcorn Dot Gif Act of 2017"
- "We won't know what's in the healthcare bill until after it's been voted on." Of course. Typical libe-what? Rand Paul? RAND PAUL
Senator Joe Leiberman (D CT)[]
Senator Ron Johnson (R WI)[]
- Senator Ron Johnson, apparently terrified of actually speaking to constituents, treats them like stalkers and sends them cease and desist letters. Of course, calling 83 times in the space of a week is a bit excessive
- And there it is, the stupidest comment on net neutrality you've heard all day
Rep. Jason Chaffetz (R UT 3rd)[]
chairman of the House Committee on Oversight and Government Reform
- Channeling St. Reagan, Jason Chaffetz suggests poors should buy healthcare instead of those Cadillacs they drive to the grocery store in order to buy steak and lobster with their food stamps
- FEC filings show Jason Chaffetz used over $700 of his campaign donors' money to shop at the Apple Store last year
- House okays using taxpayer money for Islamic schools
- (3/23/2017) Walking piece of garbage and noted hypocrite Jason Chaffetz (R-UT) proposes using facial recognition software to track illegal immigrants
Rep. Trey Gowdy (R SC 4th)[]
- Is Trey Ghowzi a scandal yet?
- Rep Trey Gowdy attempts a high profile "But what about..." during the Comey hearing, but doesn't quite stick the landing
- (3/27/2017) Apparently, Trey Gowdy missed the part where Devin Nunes admitted to running to Trump and giving him details on the Russia probe
Rep. Mike Bost (R IL 12th)[]
Rep. Nancy Pelosi (D CA 12th)[]
House minority leader
Rep. Dr. Roger Marshall (R KS 1st)[]
Rep. Steve King (R, IA 4th)[]
- Congressman Steve King (R-eally Crazy) wants a purge. No, really, he said that
- Steve King thinks he would look real snazzy in a Nazi uniform
- Republicans tell Steve King that he's being a little too obvious with the dog megaphone
- Steve King reminded on the House floor "They are our babies"
- Republican congressman and proud Twitter racist Steve King finally caves to all the pressure, gives interview detailing how he's been crushed by the weight of all of his GOP colleagues patting him on the back
- Apparently, there were people who thought Iowa was a vacation destination. Who knew?
Rep. Paul Ryan (R WI 4th)[]
Speaker of the House
- "Meh, he's a crazy asshole. What did you expect? Don't look at us, you voted for the guy." - The GOP Leadership
- For some reason Paul Ryan is acting like your boring poli sci teacher explaining obamacare repeal
- Paul Ryan: The "fatal conceit" of Obamacare is that HEALTHY people with insurance subsidize SICK people's health costs
- Much like the average Farker trying to give up drinking, Republicans are finding it hard to give up obstructionism after their 8 year long addiction
- Oh, look, Steven Mnuchin just wrote the letter begging Congress to raise the debt ceiling so America doesn't default. Let's see if Republicans are still as opposed to it as they were when Obama was president
- Paul Ryan; "Trump will never win a beauty contest." Wait, what? Oh, Trumpcare will never win a beauty contest. Coulda went either way
- Paul Ryan defends the eight days Congress is scheduled to be in session in April. Or as Congress calls working eight days in one month, putting in a little OT
- Breitbart begins sharpening some very long knives
- Paul Ryan would like to remind all Americans that Trump had his tiny hands all over the crafting of the GOP's healthcare legislation
- With his so-called healthcare bill imploding, Paul Ryan does the only thing he can do - schedule a final vote on it for next week
- Ryan goes all in on Don'tCare
- Let's check in with some actual healthcare providers and see what they think about Paul Ryan's Trumpcare powerpoint.... oh. Oh my
- (3/25/2017) Paul Ryan: We've spent so much time being the party of "no" that we've forgotten how to govern
- (3/27/2017) "I would call it 'responsible nationalism,' " Ryan said, according to Bannon. Science calls it dividing by zero, warns DO NOT DO bull{{}}
- (3/27/2017) "He is fine taking eyeglasses from children so he can pass a bill," an angry Joy Reid says of Paul Ryan and his ironic Ayn Rand philosophy. When will Republicans learn Rand was a welfare queen with terrible ideologies that would destroy America?
- (3/28/2017) Turns out Paul Ryan's reputation as a wonky genius was a bit oversold; Republicans are bedazzled when you bother to use numbers at all, but his tax plan is "a modest proposal"-level garbage
- (3/30/2017) Paul Ryan: "I've seen the documents that Freaked Devin Nunes out. But I don't think he has"
- (3/30/2017) Paul Ryan refuses to work with Democrats on health-care legislation, a fact that will not in any way prevent him from blaming them when it doesn't pass
- (3/31/2017) Paul Ryan's tax plan could finally achieve equality in the US ... by shifting 99.6 percent of the tax relief to the wealthiest 1 percent of the country so that everybody else can be equally poor
Senator Mitch McConnell (R KY)[]
Senate Majority Leader
- "Meh, he's a crazy asshole. What did you expect? Don't look at us, you voted for the guy." - The GOP Leadership
- (3/29/2017) GOP: Either Gorsuch or Gohome
- (3/30/2017) The task of salvaging the GOP's agenda falls on the shell of one man: Yertle
- (3/30/2017) GOP calls potential Gorsuch filibuster by Democrats "unprecedented". Merrick Garland unavailable for comment
Senator Chuck Grassley (R IA)[]
Senator Thom Tillis (R NC)[]
Rep. Lamar Smith (R, TX 21st)[]
Chairman of the House Science, Space and Technology Committee
- GOP lawmakers are about to pass two laws that would make it nearly impossible to sue corporations
- (3/30/2017) Republicans vote to disallow the EPA to rely on science
Rep. Pete Sessions (R TX 32nd)[]
House Rules Committee chair
- World's Greatest Healthcare Plan of 2017. No, really, that`s what it's actually called
- Trumpy Spice: "Every member of the House and Senate will be able to have their opportunity to have amendments (on TrumpCare) offered through the committee process and on the floor," GOP Leadership: The Hell you say
Rep. Buddy Carter (R GA 1st)[]
Rep. Hal Rogers (R KY 5th)[]
Sen. Jeff Flake (R AZ)[]
- Privacy, what is it good for? Absolutely nothing. GOP wants to do away with FCC's entire privacy rulemaking to allow ISPs to sell your entire browsing history to advertisers or other third parties without your consent
- GOP Senators ask Judge Gorsuch the probing questions: "What's the answer to life, the universe, and everything?" and "Would you rather fight 1 horse-sized duck or 100 duck-sized horses?" Hey, I thought there wasn't going to be a litmus test
- (3/23/2017) By 50-48 vote, the Senate passes Flake's bill to allow your ISP to sell your browsing history to anyone willing to pay for it. Evil corporations are getting tired of winning and having you for lunch
Rep. Jason Smith (R MO 8th)[]
Senator Lamar Alexander (R TN)[]
Senate Committee on Health, Education, Labor and Pensions (HELP) chairman
Senator Orrin Hatch (R UT)[]
Rep. John Shimkus (R IL 15th)[]
Rep. Devin Nunes (R CA 22nd)[]
chair, House Intelligence Committee
- The fact that the Top Republican on the House Intelligence Committee which has been charged with looking into Russia's interference in the election was also a member of Trump's transition team should in no way cast doubt on the panel's work
- Rep. Nunes claims that Trump people were picked up on FBI wiretaps of Russians, which means, technically, Obama wiretapped the Trump campaign, which is the best kind of wiretapping
- House Intelligence Committee Democrat Adam Schiff calls for independent investigation after Chairperson Devin Nunes decides to throw protocol out the window and brief the President that shiat is hitting the fan faster than anyone expected *DUN DUN*
- Rep. Nunes thought he was putting out the Trump Tweet Tapp fire. Only he reached for gasoline instead of water
- Trump feels "somewhat vindicated" about his "wire tapping" allegations. "Somewhat vindicated" is in quotes meaning not actually vindicated at all
- (3/23/2017) Devin Nunes may be trying to save his own ass
- (3/23/2017) House intel committee head apologizes for his actions yesterday, saying, "Was that wrong? Should I have not done that?"
- (3/23/2017) Rep. Quigley (D-Down Under) becomes second intel committee member to confirm more-than-circumstantial evidence of Trump-Russia collusion during the '16 campaign
- (3/23/2017) McCain: Yeah, we don't know what Nunes thought he was doing either
- (3/23/2017) Kayleigh McEnany tried to say her fellow CNN panelists didn't support the Fourth Amendment. She was quickly humiliated, as is tradition
- (3/24/2017) Devin Nunes tries to justify his betrayal of principles and duty by stating he had an "obligation" to run and tell Trump he was f*cked
- (3/24/2017) For no apparent reason, the Republican Intelligence Committee Chair decided to cancel the public hearing on the panels investigation of Trump and possible collusion with Russia
- (3/23/2017) Nancy Pelosi calls House Intelligence Committee Chair Devin Nunes "a stooge" for the president, though, observing traditional rules of legislative decorum, she declined to say WHICH stooge, but it's pretty clear she means Shemp
- (3/25/2017) The conspiracy thickens as it's revealed House Intelligence Chair Devin Nunes went on a dead of night excursion and vanished from view the night prior to revealing the full details of the Intel revelations on Trump
- (3/26/2017) Suitcases full of unmarked bills are out. These days you just have dirty politicians invest in a bit of real property or a brand and then flip that brand for a thousand times its worth while forcing distribution through an oligarch-controlled market Nunes’ heavily invested in company with ties to Russia{{}}
- (3/27/2017) Apparently, Trey Gowdy missed the part where Devin Nunes admitted to running to Trump and giving him details on the Russia probe
- (3/27/2017) Devin Nunes makes Bill Clinton's "I smoked but I did not inhale" line look positively forthright, saying he was ON the White House grounds before his big announcement, but wasn't meeting with anyone FROM the WH
- (3/28/2017) Devin Nunes tells Bill O'Reilly that Democrats want him to quit the Russiagate investigation because "they know I am quite effective." You see, he has a certain set of skills; specifically, running to the source of the investigation to warn him
- (3/28/2017) Spiceweasel: Look, if Nunes told someone, since he has clearance and is the head of the House Intelligence Committee, then he's probably authorized to share that info, even to someone without clearance
- (3/28/2017) Nunes: How can a blind man be a lookout? Graham: How can an idiot be the House Intelligence Committee Chairman? Nunes: ___
- (3/28/2017) Rep. Eric Swalwall: This is what the cover-up to a crime looks like, especially when the perpetrators are named Moe, Larry, and Curly
- (3/28/2017) The company that Nunes lists as his single largest personal investment has suddenly scrubbed all references to doing business in Russia, claiming it was a one-off deal in 2013. The Russian distributor says they still are doing business to this day Alpha Omega Winery
- (3/28/2017) Nunes: I have investigated myself and found no wrong-doing
- (3/29/2017) You have to hand it to House Republicans, they are steadfastly refusing to throw Devin Nunes under the bus, instead they've decided they will ALL climb under the bus together and show those wheels who's boss
- (3/29/2017) The evidence is now clear that the White House and Devin Nunes, the chairman of the House Intelligence Committee, have worked together to halt the Russia Investigation
- (3/29/2017) Devin Nunes explains that he wouldn't be totally cocking up this whole Russian investigation if the Democrats weren't forcing him to do a really bad job and also to betray his responsibility by being Trump's bootlicking toadie. See? The Dems did it
- (3/30/2017) Paul Ryan: "I've seen the documents that Freaked Devin Nunes out. But I don't think he has"
- (3/30/2017) Two aides have hit the Nunes Tower. Oh the hilarity
Rep. Joe "The Oil Gargler" Barton (R TX 6th)[]
Senator Mike Crapo (R ID)[]
chair, Senate Banking Committee
- The "Hearing Protection Act" is a GOP-introduced bill to a) update laws for maximal headphone volume output, b) make measurement of sound levels at live concerts mandatory, c) reduce restrictions on gun silencers
- (3/29/2017) Republican senators decide to review the whole "too big to fail" process
Rep. Jeff Duncan (R SC 3rd)[]
Rep. Chris Collins (R NY 27th)[]
- "He's doing everything that he promised he would do - working to secure our borders, took us out of TPP, has the best cabinet that has never been assembled in history," says GOP congressman who gave Trump an A for his performance. Hilarity ensued
- (3/24/2017) Old and busted: "We have to pass the bill so that you can find out what is in it." New hotness: "Once we get it done, we can have the chance to really explain it"
former Rep. Steve Stockman (R TX 9th, 36th)[]
Rep. Dave Brat (R VA 7th)[]
Rep. Duncan Hunter (R CA 50th)[]
Rep. Glenn Grothman (R WI 6th)[]
Senator Lindsey Graham (R SC)[]
Rep. Mark Meadows (R NC 11th)[]
- (3/27/2017) Now that they control government again, Republicans are back to saying that "deficits don't matter"
- (3/27/2017) Freedom Caucus member hailed as hero for stopping leopards from eating his constituents' faces by trying to make leopards eat . . . jeez, even this stupid meme can't make sense of what's going on anymore
Senator Richard Burr (R NC)[]
Senator Tom Cotton (R AR)[]
Senator Dick Durbin (D IL)[]
Minority Whip
Senator Chuck Schumer (D NY)[]
Minority Leader
Senator Jon Tester (D MT)[]
Senator Claire McCaskill (D-MO)[]
- (3/30/2017) Sen. Claire McCaskill (D-MO) can't decide if she'd rather lose her seat in a general election, or a primary
Senator Rob Portman (R OH)[]
- (3/30/2017) GOP calls potential Gorsuch filibuster by Democrats "unprecedented". Merrick Garland unavailable for comment
Senator David Perdue (R GA)[]
- (3/30/2017) GOP calls potential Gorsuch filibuster by Democrats "unprecedented". Merrick Garland unavailable for comment
Senator John Cornyn (R TX)[]
Majority Whip
- (3/30/2017) GOP calls potential Gorsuch filibuster by Democrats "unprecedented". Merrick Garland unavailable for comment
Senator Heidi Heitkamp (D ND)[]
- (3/30/2017) First two Democratic Senators choose to be primaried next year, drag the Overton Window further rightward
Senator Joe Manchin (D WV)[]
- (3/30/2017) First two Democratic Senators choose to be primaried next year, drag the Overton Window further rightward
Rep. Jodey Arrington (R TX 19th)[]
JV Team[]
All these threads were moved to the ALECworks page
WTF?[]
WTF!?
Senator Claire McCaskill (D MO)[]
Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz (D FL 23rd)[]
Senator Chris Coons (D DE)[]
Senator Lindsay Graham (R, SC)[]
- Media reports that Trump is meeting with former rivals in a "charm offensive." Minus the charm
- (3/30/2017) Mike Huckabee caught on tape making assumptions on Lindsey Graham's sexuality
Senator Ted Cruz (R TX)[]
Senator Marco Rubio (R FL)[]
- Media reports that Trump is meeting with former rivals in a "charm offensive." Minus the charm
- (3/31/2017) "Part of the reason active measures have worked in this U.S. election is because the commander in chief has used Russian active measures, at times, against his opponents"
Senator Al Franken (D MN)[]
Rep. Louie Gohmert (R TX 1st)[]
Senator Mitch McConnell (R KY)[]
Senate Majority Leader
Senator Bernie Sanders (I VT)[]
Senator John McCain (R AZ)[]
- News: Sen. McCain directly accuses politician of working directly for the Russians and Vladimir Putin, on the senate floor. Fark: Sen. Rand Paul of Kentucky for not supporting bill to advance Montenegro's bid to join NATO
- (3/29/2017) North Korea threatens war with the United States over Senator John McCain's amateur outreach (Not safe for work content in sidebar/below article)
Senator RANDPAUL (R KY)[]
- News: Sen. McCain directly accuses politician of working directly for the Russians and Vladimir Putin, on the senate floor. Fark: Sen. Rand Paul of Kentucky for not supporting bill to advance Montenegro's bid to join NATO
- Rand Paul predicts that Trumpcare will pass, fail completely, and only then after the complete collapse of the healthcare system will any real negotiations towards healthcare reform begin
Rep. Alan Lowenthal (D CA 47th)[]
Rep. Paul Ryan (R WI 1st)[]
Speaker of the House
- (3/24/2017) Will he announce his resignation on the heels of a crushing defeat? Will he blame the Democrats? Will he blame Trump and Pence? THIS is your Paul Ryan "seppuku" press conference (4pm start) Live thread
- (3/24/2017) Sometimes you drain the swamp, sometimes the swamp drains you
Senator Joni Earnst (R IA)[]
Rep. Peter King (R NY 2nd)[]
Rep. Maxine Waters (D CA 43rd)[]
- (3/23/2017) Please note: when preparing a legal attack, please make sure the target of your lawsuit actually exists tweet from Transportation Secretary's account encourages sitting member of U.S. Congress to sue POTUS' "soul"
Senator Elizabeth Warren (D MA)[]
Rep. Ted Poe (R TX 2nd)[]
JV Team[]
These links were moved to the ALECworks page
Wait-and-See[]
these Congresscritters aren't sure yet how their decisions will play politically, so they're not committing to anything publicly
Rep. Charlie Dent (R PA 15th)[]
Rep. Barbara Comstock (R VA 10th)[]
Rep. John Faso (R NY 19th)[]
Rep. Dan Donovan (R NY 11th)[]
Senator Tom Cotton (R AR)[]
Rep. Nancy Pelosi (D CA 12th)[]
House Minority Leader
- Dems to Sessions: GTFO
- (3/29/2017) Will it ever be okay for Democrats to work with Trump? Template:Comp
Senator Chuck Schumer (D NY)[]
Senate minority leader
- (3/29/2017) Will it ever be okay for Democrats to work with Trump? Template:Comp
Everyone Else[]
Rep. Keith Ellison (D MN 5th)[]
- It's almost as if two adults, who agree on most things, can sit together and work after they compete
Rep. Nancy Pelosi (D CA 12th)[]
House Minority Leader
- Dems to Sessions: GTFO
- (3/23/2017) Nancy Pelosi calls House Intelligence Committee Chair Devin Nunes "a stooge" for the president, though, observing traditional rules of legislative decorum, she declined to say WHICH stooge, but it's pretty clear she means Shemp
- (3/28/2017) Nunes: I have investigated myself and found no wrong-doing
Rep. Adam Schiff (D CA 28th)[]
ranking member, House Intelligence Committee
- Democrats are finally realizing that Comey knows quite a bit more about Russia and Trump than he's letting on
- Adam Schiff says that Session' explanations for his meetings with the Russian ambassador "make no sense"; tells Jack McCoy to have detectives Briscoe and Green bring him in and go over his statements again
- House Intelligence Committee requests that Trump FW:FW:FW:FW:FW: over his evidence of wiretapping by Monday
- Trump defenders are starting to sound like English Lit professors at a Joyce seminar: "So now you have to decide, are you going to take the tweets literally? And if you are then clearly the president was wrong. But if you're not"
- Trump leaked classified CIA intel to Tucker Carlson on live TV: ranking House intel member
- "Circumstantial evidence" regarding collusion between Russia and Trump campaign. The seven or so Trump surrogates who had many meetings with Russians not withstanding
- Intel offers no evidence of Trump Tower spying. To be honest, I always suspected AMD
- House Intelligence Committee Democrat Adam Schiff calls for independent investigation after Chairperson Devin Nunes decides to throw protocol out the window and brief the President that shiat is hitting the fan faster than anyone expected *DUN DUN*
- (3/24/2017) Former Trump campaign hanger-on Paul Manafort offers to perjure himself in front of the House Intelligence Committee
Senator Lindsay Graham (R, SC)[]
- Dems to Sessions: GTFO
- Lindsey Graham vows to "find out all things Russian" and has put Trump right in his crosshairs
- Lindsey Graham threatens to impeach Trump if he starts waterboarding. I hope surfboarding is still okay, since we know Trump loves his water sports
- (3/28/2017) Nunes: I have investigated myself and found no wrong-doing
Senator Al Franken (D MN)[]
- Sorry Dems, the whole Jeff Sessions gig you've got going is nothing but fake news
- Sen. Franken: Lies, and the perjured Jeff Sessions who tells them
Senator Chuck Schumer (D NY)[]
Senate minority leader
Rep. Ted Lieu (D CA 33rd)[]
- Congressman points out to Trump that if his TT phones were tapped, then he's in deeper poop than he imagined because the tap would have required a warrant , which in turn would have required Probable Cause in front of a FISA judge
- (3/24/2017) Congressman: You know, it might be a good idea to pause the President's legislative agenda until the investigation into his possible collusion with the Russian government is complete
Senator Tom Cotton (R AR)[]
Senator Ben Sasse (R NE)[]
Senator Sheldon Whitehouse (D RI)[]
- Senators push to force Southern White House to obey regular White House open records laws
- (3/24/2017) Democratic Congressman: Since the President claims he works while golfing at Mar-a-lago, shouldn't he be publishing the visitor's log so that we know who is influencing him? Oh yeah, while we're at it, let's demand the White House log as well
- (3/28/2017) Good thing people like Russian oligarchs don't visit Trump and associates at Mar-a-Lago. I mean, imagine if there were visitor logs and records of those visits? Boy, would it look bad if they were on there, ya know?
- (3/29/2017) Government Accountability Office decides that maybe it should look into this whole "Mar A Lago" thing. At least until Trump declares them enemy combatants
Senator Tom Udall (D NM)[]
- Senators push to force Southern White House to obey regular White House open records laws
- (3/24/2017) Democratic Congressman: Since the President claims he works while golfing at Mar-a-lago, shouldn't he be publishing the visitor's log so that we know who is influencing him? Oh yeah, while we're at it, let's demand the White House log as well
- (3/28/2017) Good thing people like Russian oligarchs don't visit Trump and associates at Mar-a-Lago. I mean, imagine if there were visitor logs and records of those visits? Boy, would it look bad if they were on there, ya know?
- (3/29/2017) Government Accountability Office decides that maybe it should look into this whole "Mar A Lago" thing. At least until Trump declares them enemy combatants
Senator Ron Wyden (D OR)[]
Senator Jack Reed (D RI)[]
- Senators push to force Southern White House to obey regular White House open records laws
- (3/24/2017) Democratic Congressman: Since the President claims he works while golfing at Mar-a-lago, shouldn't he be publishing the visitor's log so that we know who is influencing him? Oh yeah, while we're at it, let's demand the White House log as well
- (3/28/2017) Good thing people like Russian oligarchs don't visit Trump and associates at Mar-a-Lago. I mean, imagine if there were visitor logs and records of those visits? Boy, would it look bad if they were on there, ya know?
- (3/29/2017) Government Accountability Office decides that maybe it should look into this whole "Mar A Lago" thing. At least until Trump declares them enemy combatants
- (3/30/2017) Trump's AF Sec. Nom kept dodging Senator questions about consulting work she did for Sandia National labs which they're curious about since the company refunded $443K of the $464K they were paid after the GAO couldn't find any work they'd done
Senator Tom Carper (D DE)[]
- Senators push to force Southern White House to obey regular White House open records laws
- (3/24/2017) Democratic Congressman: Since the President claims he works while golfing at Mar-a-lago, shouldn't he be publishing the visitor's log so that we know who is influencing him? Oh yeah, while we're at it, let's demand the White House log as well
- (3/28/2017) Good thing people like Russian oligarchs don't visit Trump and associates at Mar-a-Lago. I mean, imagine if there were visitor logs and records of those visits? Boy, would it look bad if they were on there, ya know?
- (3/29/2017) Government Accountability Office decides that maybe it should look into this whole "Mar A Lago" thing. At least until Trump declares them enemy combatants
Senator Kirsten Gillibrand (D NY)[]
Senator Richard Blumenthal (D CT)[]
- Senators push to force Southern White House to obey regular White House open records laws
- (3/31/2017) Senator Richard Blumenthal will cast a no vote in confirming Gorsuch
Senator Chris Van Hollen (D MD)[]
Rep. Elijah Cummings (D MD 7th)[]
- Mike Pence: "I had no knowledge that Michael Flynn was working as a paid lobbyist during the campaign" Elijah Cummings: " Here's the letter I sent you on Nov. 18 warning that Flynn was a paid lobbyist" Pence: "Can I get a smoke bomb over here?"
- Elijah Cummings says there might be a connection between Bharara's firing and the ongoing Trump investigation. Time to bust out the "well duh" images
- (3/24/2017) Cummings and Chaffetz request Michael Flynn documents from White Hous-Oh shucks, seems they all fell into one of the several fireplaces in the White House. Wet floors will do that, ya know
Senator Chris Murphy (D CT)[]
Rep. Maxine Waters (D CA 43rd)[]
Rep. Tom Graves (R GA 14th)[]
Rep. Mike Doyle (D PA 14th)[]
Rep. Tom O’Halleran (D AZ 1st)[]
Rep. Michael Burgess (R TX 26th)[]
Rep. Devin Nunes (R CA 22nd)[]
chair, House Intelligence Committee
- House Intelligence Committee requests that Trump FW:FW:FW:FW:FW: over his evidence of wiretapping by Monday
- Trump defenders are starting to sound like English Lit professors at a Joyce seminar: "So now you have to decide, are you going to take the tweets literally? And if you are then clearly the president was wrong. But if you're not"
- Intel offers no evidence of Trump Tower spying. To be honest, I always suspected AMD
- Get to know Intelligence Committee Chair Devin Nunes, a former dairy farmer in charge of US spies and intel
Senator John McCain (R AZ)[]
- John McCain predicts there are "more shoes to drop" over Russiaghazi
- (3/23/2017) McCain: Guys who exonerated me on that Keating Five thing clearly can't be trusted to investigate Trump
- (3/23/2017) McCain: Yeah, we don't know what Nunes thought he was doing either
Rep. Eric Swalwell (D CA 15th)[]
- Steve King reminded on the House floor "They are our babies"
- (3/28/2017) Rep. Eric Swalwall: This is what the cover-up to a crime looks like, especially when the perpetrators are named Moe, Larry, and Curly
Senator RANDPAUL (R KY)[]
Group of GOP Senators[]
who requested anonymity
Rep. Paul Ryan (R WI 1st)[]
Rep. Beto O'Rourke (D TX 16th)[]
Rep. Will Hurd (R TX 23rd)[]
Senator Russ Feingold (D WI)[]
former Rep. David Jolly (R FL 13th)[]
Senator Mike Lee (R UT)[]
Rep. Mike Quigley (D IL 5th)[]
- (3/23/2017) Rep. Quigley (D-Down Under) becomes second intel committee member to confirm more-than-circumstantial evidence of Trump-Russia collusion during the '16 campaign
- (3/24/2017) Democratic Congressman: Since the President claims he works while golfing at Mar-a-lago, shouldn't he be publishing the visitor's log so that we know who is influencing him? Oh yeah, while we're at it, let's demand the White House log as well
- (3/28/2017) Good thing people like Russian oligarchs don't visit Trump and associates at Mar-a-Lago. I mean, imagine if there were visitor logs and records of those visits? Boy, would it look bad if they were on there, ya know?
- (3/29/2017) Government Accountability Office decides that maybe it should look into this whole "Mar A Lago" thing. At least until Trump declares them enemy combatants
Rep. Jason Chaffetz (R UT 3rd)[]
chairman, House Oversight Committee
- (3/24/2017) Cummings and Chaffetz request Michael Flynn documents from White Hous-Oh shucks, seems they all fell into one of the several fireplaces in the White House. Wet floors will do that, ya know
- (3/31/2017) Jayson Chaffetz has rare moment of clarity, points out that Donnie needs to STFU about Flynn's request for immunity. Things to return to normal in Jason's head in 3, 2, 1
Senator Mark Warner (D VA)[]
- (3/30/2017) Russia hired 1000 people to create anti-Clinton fake news during the election. Fake. News
JV Squad[]
These links were moved to the ALECworks page
See Also[]
- Drumpfster Fire
- ALECworks
- the archive for this page
- Defying GOP's Wet Dream of One Party Rule of U.S. Government